Grin for the day

I was at Tesco earlier this morning, when a lady dropped dead in front of me. I felt really sorry for her - she had just bought a Bag for Life.

This one made me chuckle this morning

A guy walks in to a bar and asks for a rum and coke and the bartender gives him an apple, he takes a bite, "it tastes like rum!" "Turn it around" the bartender replies. He turns it around, takes another bite and says "it tastes like coke! That's amazing!" Another guy walks in and orders a gin and tonic, the same thing happens. A last guy walks in and the two guys say "this bartender has an apple with every flavor!" The last man responds "do you have one that tastes like pussy?" The bartender hands him an apple. "AH! THIS TASTES LIKE SHIT!!" The bartender says "turn it around