Banned from Sainsburys

Banned from Sainsbury's

Didn't like shopping there anyway..

Yesterday I was at my local Sainsbury's store buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? #
So, since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was
starting the Winalot Diet again.
I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in hospital last time, but I'd lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in queue was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked me if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me, I told her no, I stepped off the kerb to sniff an Irish Setter's arse and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
I'm now banned from Sainsbury's.

Aw ive just gone into cardiac arrest

This is the best thing I've ever heard! Hahaha!

lol
now that explains your bright eyes and glossy coat :whistle:

:lol: :lol: :lol:
ha ha ha thats brilliant mate i will remember that one. Me and are lass think its funny slipping large packs of condoms in peoples trolleys and watching there horrified faces putting them on the conveyor belts at the check out piss funny especially old couples :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy:

ha ha great,laptop nearly fell off my knee whilst laughing. very funny.:laugh:

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Keefe that's ace
myers647 you're :evil:

myers647 wrote: :lol: :lol: :lol:
ha ha ha thats brilliant mate i will remember that one. Me and are lass think its funny slipping large packs of condoms in peoples trolleys and watching there horrified faces putting them on the conveyor belts at the check out piss funny especially old couples :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy: :ohmy:

I know what i'm going to do now when bored in Tescos :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Absolutely awesome!

Keeping a straight face must have been tricky.

Did you really get banned? - things have gone downhill since I worked for them as a lad!

I'd ask you in more often for the entertainment!

Kirkynut